So, who are you?

My name is Justin Ryan, and as the box over there says, I’m 29, I was born in June, my favourite colour is blue, and I have way too many jobs.

A bit more?

I’m a vegetarian, I like to cook, I enjoy good wine, and I have an inappropriate love of premium gins and tequilas. I collect rubber ducks and penguins, and I like to make avatars. I enjoy shopping, especially for shoes.

I’m a skate geek (I ride goofy, of course) and a huge Chaz Ortiz fan. I also like to watch BMX, motocross, and rally — pretty much action sports in general. I like alt-rock and pop-punk music, particularly Angels & Airwaves. I may have an obsessive and inappropriate love of Tom DeLonge.

I’m a Linux geek, and have been since early 2006. I run Ubuntu and LMDE across a mix of desktops, servers, laptops, and netbooks. (I also have a Win7 tablet — shhh, don’t tell.)

    

Family?

I have a twin brother, JM¹ — I’m the older one, by a little over six years. (Talk about parturition from hell…) I’m taller and extroverted, he’s a bit shorter and introverted, but otherwise, we’re a perfectly matched set. He’s a brilliant coder and all-around awesome guy, and I’m incredibly proud of him. Since I am just a tad bit older, I usually refer to him as “Little Bro”.

I also have four sisters, none of whom are legally related to me: Crystal Edwards, Kattni Rembor, Lisa Hoover, and Jenn Czeck.

As for biological family, yes, I have one. I prefer to think of most of them as people I share DNA with. Anybody who doesn’t believe my brother & sisters are my real family can bite me.

¹ JR & JM — funny, innit?

What’s DuckDuckBlue?

DuckDuckBlue is a web support and development company. We specialise in WordPress, working primarily with online professionals.

I’m the “Chief Quack” — cute titles aside, I’m the lead problem solver, head geek, senior customer service rep, and overall guy who gets stuff done.

You write?

I’m a well-published writer, both online and in print. I’ve written on personal finance, individual growth, small business and start-ups, technology, sex, and occasionally legal commentary. I’m well versed in classic men’s style, enough to have written on it extensively and be asked to edit a series of books.

I’m a Contributing Editor for Linux Journal, the premier magazine of the Linux community, and spent three years as its News Editor. Before that, I was Managing Editor of an online magazine/community for women.

My writing has been spotlighted by a number of popular sites, including Lifehacker, The Consumerist, Freelance Switch, and Zen Habits. My tech writing has hit Digg, Technorati, Slashdot, and Reddit, and was regularly syndicated.

  

Are you Australian? Do you live there?

Nope, American, not Australian. I live in the US, and always have, though I’d love to live upside down. Little Bro says I qualify to be an Honorary Aussie.

I do get asked about it a lot, though. I live on Brisbane time (GMT+10) because of my sleep disorder, which offsets my natural schedule by 14-15 hours. Since I think and talk in “my time”, it can be confusing for those who don’t know. (I sometimes think of it as living in an Australian colony in the middle of the US.)

Likewise, my natural writing style is very British, and I tend towards Commonwealth English (though not 100%), so it’s easy to assume I’m an Aussie, something I consider a high compliment.

 

I heard you’re a nut.

I am not a nut. I’m a legume.

I have bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, generalised anxiety disorder, and panic disorder, a circadian-rhythm sleep disorder and hypersomina, among several other conditions.² I’m open about being and having been sick, and that I take medication.

I think it’s important to be open and have a sense of humour about having disabilities. I refer to myself as crazy or completely whacked because a) those labels can’t hurt me, and b) it breaks stereotypes (and tension) when you announce that the cheese slid off your cracker long ago and you know it.

Because I’ve been asked quite often, I’ll say it here: If you need somebody to talk to about yourself or someone you know, or just have questions in general, get in touch. I’m happy to talk with people, and I don’t tell anybody’s secrets.

² Yes, it’s uncommon to have that many comorbid conditions,
but it’s not uncommon to see a mix of those together.

 

staninjury?

When I signed up for Gmail, “justinryan” and most of the usual variations were taken. I looked at anagrams, and “Stan Injury” was the most interesting.

 

fifi???

Ah, Fifi. I really don’t know where Fifi came from — probably Twitter or #linuxjournal. Still, every guy needs an exotic dancer alter-ego, and what a one to have. If you’re really interested — and please, if you are, get help — there’s a bit more about her in my obituary.

The best way to explain her?

<@Fifi> What’s my sign? “Danger: Curves ahead.”

What’s with the avatars?

My avatars are one of my favourite parts of my online life, both representing what’s important to me and commemorating special events and occasions.

The character himself, basic wardrobe items, and Daniel the Penguin come from WeeWorld. Once I have a base, I customise it heavily by hand, a process that often takes four to six (or more) hours to complete. Because of this, I’m not able to create new ones as often as I once could.

Each contains items that reference my life and interests, often hidden in plain sight or with double meanings. The expression on my face is perpetual bewilderment — it has only changed once, to celebrate one of the brightest moments in my life.

My current general purpose avatar, shown above in the sidebar, was created for Summer 2011. Among the references, common to most of my avatars:

• My shirt and shoes are from Macbeth Footwear, my favourite skate shoe company. The shoes are Tom DeLonge Studio Project Brightons, accurate to the last detail.
• My hat is from Hurley, my favourite skate clothing company. My backpack, from Vans, is identical to the one I use in real life. Behind it is a Chaz Ortiz skate deck, which I also have in real life.
• On my left wrist is a red silicone medic-alert bracelet. On the right is a silver Mental Health & Brain Disease advocacy bracelet. I wear both in real life, 24/7, though on the opposite wrists.
• Daniel also wears a silver bracelet on his left flipper. We both wear rainbow Gay Rights advocacy bracelets on the left.
• On my right forearm is a tattoo of the logo for Angels & Airwaves, my favourite band. The tattoo on my left forearm is a reference to my little brother, and is always present, even under long sleeves. (Both are purely symbolic, though I have a real tattoo elsewhere.)

Those who have met me in person claim my avatar is fairly true-to-life, with minor exceptions: I’m taller, I have brown eyes & wear glasses, and usually have a half-grin on my face.

Why the penguin?

Because I like penguins!

The mascot for Linux is a penguin named Tux. My penguin’s name is Daniel, and is usually found standing next to my avatar, often with something special to mark the occasion of the day. He enjoys dancing, fine wine, and Pierce Brosnan movies.

 

What’s the deal with celery?

Mmm, celery.

My relationship with celery is a loooooong running joke that came out of the Linux Journal IRC channel. I have a rare gift for coming up with bizarre things to say in the moment, and a talent for getting them in at just the right time.

One afternoon, a couple of our regulars got on the topic of why movies with talking animals are so popular. They came to the conclusion that people who talk to their pets feel a void because their pets can’t talk to them, and these movies fill that longing.

I happened to wander in just as one of them said:

But how many talking/singing animal movies does it take before that fantasy is fulfilled?

I immediately replied:

If it’s anything like the fantasy of being tied up and whipped with wet celery in the bell-tower of an abandoned church by a Carmelite nun, 63.

The conversation died there (what can I say, it’s a gift) and a legend was born.

What’s this blog about?

The Underblog is my personal blog, and the stuff I write here is for me. Sometimes other people find it interesting, but it’s here because it was on my mind and I wanted to say it. Most of it is pretty weird, and some of it is downright dirty, because I’m pretty weird and my mind is downright dirty. About 85% isn’t for the faint of heart — 100% isn’t for those without a sense of humour.

If you happen to be a client who has stumbled in wondering who I am, feel free to have a look around if you really want to — I am who I am. If you want to know what I can do for you, though, you’ll find a better picture at my professional site.

What’s next?

If you’ve read this far and are still interested in what I have to say, you’ll find plenty of it. This site is littered with random thoughts I’ve left laying about, and I can be found saying God knows what on Twitter.

Linux Journal has an IRC channel — #linuxjournal — on the freenode network, and I’m usually lurking around there as JustinRyan. (Be warned, it’s just as weird.) Otherwise, the contact page would be a good place to start.