She awoke with a start.

She brushed the sleep from her eyes and looked around the bedroom. Everything seemed to be in perfect order.

She heard an odd noise coming from outside the room. She couldn’t quite explain it.

Rising from her bed, she stepped into the hall, nightgown flowing. She walked towards the door, and reached tentatively for it. She drew a quick breath and flung it wide.

There he stood, just as it had always been.

He turned to her, as though he’d been there all along, and said a single word.

“Morning.”

“Absolute rubbish,” said Arthur, closing the strange looking book on his lap. “What silly things Americans will — er, would, no, will — watch. Who shot J.R.? my ear.”

Arthur was trying to relive the best days of the Earth, his Earth, the old Earth, and despite the fact that the entire entry for the planet read “Mostly harmless,” he found that it included nearly every episode of every soap opera ever filmed there. There wasn’t a single decent program, though — no Buffy the Vampire Slayer, no Frasier, not even a single episode of Last of the Summer Wine, the longest running sitcom in, well, what used to be, what was, no, what is the world. Finding nothing of interest, Arthur put it away, just in time to hear his name called out, in stereo.

“Rubbish. Absolute rubbish,” said the Grebulon leader. “There’s nothing worth watching left on Earth television, and it’s rising into Capricorn. Fix it.”

Just then, the Earth — and everything on it — disappeared.

Mrs. Wilberforce closed the book and put it down on the counter. She was somewhat upset with the ending: Alternate universes? Amnesiac aliens on Rupert? The Vogons winning in the end? It just didn’t sit right with her.

She looked up at the display — which she had been ignoring since a rather engrossing episode of Sally Jesse Krebulac ended — and noticed the blinking light.

It was time.

“Sophie?” she called out. “Sophie from Shinola? They’re ready for your interview.”

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Wondering what the heck this is? See Nathan’s blog for where it all began. Check out Part XIII right here on The Underblog, read the preceding chapter, Part 30 on Charles’ blog, though you’ll probably need Part 29 from Brian’s blog, too. I’ll get back to you later on where anything else that may come along turns up.

1. Sophie from Shinola Part 8 | Random (but not really) Says:
   April 22nd, 2008 at 8:01 pm

   [...] Me Part 25 – Vince Part 26 – Kimberly Ann Part 27 – Tom Part 28 – Kate Part 29 – Bryan Part 30 – C Part 31 – Justin Ryan Part 32 – [...]

2. Sophie from Shinola, Part the Last | Random (but not really) Says:
   April 22nd, 2008 at 8:06 pm

   [...] Me Part 25 – Vince Part 26 – Kimberly Ann Part 27 – Tom Part 28 – Kate Part 29 – Bryan Part 30 – C Part 31 – Justin Ryan Part 32 – [...]

3. Charles Follymacher Says:
   April 23rd, 2008 at 12:59 pm

   Heh! Good stuff!

4. Jeri Says:
   April 24th, 2008 at 12:58 am

   Pretty funny, decisive ending. It was all a dream.

5. Justin Says:
   April 24th, 2008 at 4:40 am

   You can certainly take it that way. I deliberately left it somewhat open-ended, so you could decide what you think the “interlude” was. I just couldn’t miss the opportunity to do the Dallas bit.

6. Shawn Powers Says:
   April 27th, 2008 at 10:32 pm

   Hi. I tagged you. I know it sucks. But I didn’t start it. Blame Nathan. He didn’t start it either, but you know, just don’t blame me.